Why it works
You might expect people to like you more after you do them a favor. The opposite also holds: they like you more after they do you one.
The usual explanation is cognitive dissonance. Helping someone they don’t like makes people uncomfortable, so their brain quietly resolves it by deciding they must like you after all.
The favor has to be small and freely given. A big or pressured request triggers resentment instead.
How to use it
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Ask for something tiny
A book, a quick opinion, a recommendation. It must be easy to say yes to.
“You know this area better than me. Which one would you pick?” -
Thank them specifically
Say exactly how it helped. That makes the favor feel meaningful to them.
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Keep it occasional
One small ask now and then. A stream of requests turns a favor into a burden.
Where it comes from
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